Model Senate
During the Model Senate Project students were asked to write legislation and speeches that were in the role of a senator that was chosen for them by a teacher. We were divided into committees; immigration, college debt and climate change, where students would vote, caucus and debate about the proposed bill for each committee. The final exihibition is full senate floor where all the passed bills were debated and voted on. I was an expert in the immigration committee so I wrote an expert speech giving insight and opinion about the proposed immigration bill, as well as proposed amendments that I thought would help the bill make it through the senate. As well as being an expert I was also a senator from Oregon so I played that role when authoring amendments to the bill, voting on amendments and voting on the bill.
Expert Notes
Expert Speech
Chat Around the Trailer with Kiddy Camper Keiran and Boy Scout Ben
Humanities Writing Goals
I would like to improve my presentation of the thesis. In the Highly Cynical People Seminar Reflection my thesis said “Whether or not we formally recognize it, naive cynicism plays a large part in this election through news and social media outlets, as well as through the actions and words of the candidates themselves, the ramifications of this to each individual's views are often easy to see and frequently takes some form of naive cynicism.” Although the thesis was accurate to my argument it feels long and overly complicated. Those things are not necessarily bad but a clear thesis is useful and easy for the reader. In the future making my thesis a piece of my paper that can constantly be revised will aid in moving it towards a more clear presentation. Another option would be to plan my argument in a way that I could easily include all necessary parts of the thesis without adding extra fat.
I would like to improve my use of quotations in my writing. During junior year during The Bluest Eye Literary Analysis I said “Early in the book when Pecola is trying to decipher what makes her so ugly she realizes that, ‘if those eyes of hers were different, that is to say, beautiful, she herself would be different.’” The comma used before the quote is unnecessary. After looking through many of my writings from the past year I have seen multiple instances of this. I also clearly remember receiving feedback saying that I should be careful about my quotations but I could not locate that document. In the future using quotations in the fashion that I did in paragraph one will make the writing smoother and it will be correct. Another way to avoid such instances would be to plan my evidence so that my sentence can be structured around it.
In the future I would like to make my sentences flow smoothly by making them more clear and concise. In the Meaning Project Proposal from last year I said “ I think that I would like to write a story about Jonah and how he tried to hide from God. Not because of the bible story because I think Jonah displays a great amount of uncertainty and that is how I feel right now.” Although the sentence conveyed my message it has unnecessary words that drag it and, honestly, make it feel a little less professional. I have come a long way from freshman year and I even see now that I have reduced the fat in my writing but it never hurts to continue to improve a skill. In the future I could avoid sentences like the one above by simply revising the text. Another option would be to highlight the sentence or sentences so that I can remember to polish them later on in the writing process.
I would like to improve my use of quotations in my writing. During junior year during The Bluest Eye Literary Analysis I said “Early in the book when Pecola is trying to decipher what makes her so ugly she realizes that, ‘if those eyes of hers were different, that is to say, beautiful, she herself would be different.’” The comma used before the quote is unnecessary. After looking through many of my writings from the past year I have seen multiple instances of this. I also clearly remember receiving feedback saying that I should be careful about my quotations but I could not locate that document. In the future using quotations in the fashion that I did in paragraph one will make the writing smoother and it will be correct. Another way to avoid such instances would be to plan my evidence so that my sentence can be structured around it.
In the future I would like to make my sentences flow smoothly by making them more clear and concise. In the Meaning Project Proposal from last year I said “ I think that I would like to write a story about Jonah and how he tried to hide from God. Not because of the bible story because I think Jonah displays a great amount of uncertainty and that is how I feel right now.” Although the sentence conveyed my message it has unnecessary words that drag it and, honestly, make it feel a little less professional. I have come a long way from freshman year and I even see now that I have reduced the fat in my writing but it never hurts to continue to improve a skill. In the future I could avoid sentences like the one above by simply revising the text. Another option would be to highlight the sentence or sentences so that I can remember to polish them later on in the writing process.